Since most of our friends had other plans and we couldn't get Luke Bryan tickets (without paying an arm and a leg) Eli and I decided that we were going to Vancouver to meet our other friend Caitlyn and just see what trouble we could get into. Both of us were counting down the seconds, anxiously watching the clock until we could take the peaceful drive to the ferry to begin our 24 hour escape, without kids and husbands. Once we got on that ferry was when we were able to really relax. There was no turning back now!! So with our big backpacks full of fancy clothes, tequila, juice and anything else we might need, we grabbed the bus in Vancouver and headed to Park Royal. Oh, and we also took turns carrying the box of cake I had made that morning. (There was no way I trusted anyone else to make my birthday cake, and I WAS going to eat cake on my birthday!) We ended up hitting three stores, eat lunch at Whole Foods, took two separate busses, and walked about three blocks to make it to Caitlyn's place. The cake was mostly intact...mostly.
After a little rest, we decided to go out for dinner, Poncho's, a local Mexican restaurant. Both the food and margaritas were equally delicious. At the end of dinner the entire staff came out with a cake and sparklers, singing Happy Birthday. We all (including me.) thought 'aww, it's someones birthday!' Then we realized it was for me! I was grateful and surprised by the gesture, however I couldn't eat the cake because of my wheat allergy. Eli was worried that she would have to eat the entire piece of cake by herself. The three of us managed to make that cake disappear in record time.
Next, we took a cab to the Burlesque Festival, since we were able to get last minute tickets. (But not before heading to the dollar store to deck me out in a rainbow feather boa and a birthday princess tiara) By far, the best cab ride EVER. We got to talking about how HOT Luke Bryan is (obviously) and his response was: "Why do you want Luke Bryan? I am the hottest guy on the planet!" I don't what was more funny. This middle aged mans comb-over, his comment, or his ridiculous laugh. Whatever it was, it got us all giggling. He kept this on the entire ten minute drive, weaving in and out of traffic, narrowly missing at least one pedestrian. At one point, Eli even had a man offer her his nuts from the side of the road. Granted he was selling them legitimately from his "Roasted Chestnuts" food cart.
When we got to the Burlesque Festival, right on time,we had quite a bit of fun taking in all the crazy outfits, and there were more boobies than you could shake a stick at! We were ready! The lights went dim, our excitement grew and guess what the opening act was?! A metal band? YEP! We were laughing so hard, we could hardly contain it! It wasn't long though, before the mostly naked ladies came out. And ohhh boy, did I get some great ideas for next years Boudoir Rouge!! I think that Eli's reaction to the final act was the best part of the show. This was when a very muscular and sexy black man came out, danced down to nothing but glitter pasties on his nipples and a glitter sock cover his penis, which was flailing about quite vigorously.
Our next plan was to meet up with another friend and go dancing!! YES, dancing!! We met up at the Roxy and danced to some pretty great tunes from the cover band. The songs were awesome and the company was even better. Eli got hit on by what looked to be a 13 year old, and all of us got attempted lap danced from drunk men at one point or another. We ended up back at Caitlyn's by 1am, ate a large amount of birthday cake and passed out.
The next morning was probably the best morning we both had in a very long time. We slept in, in a dark and QUIET place, until 10am!! 10am! And not only did we not rush to get out of bed, we got cake and ate it in bed. It was so amazing to lay in bed in peace, get up when we wanted, and not have to answer a million questions or fulfil any demands from little people. Don't get me wrong, I love my little family, but this morning was like winning the lottery! When we finally did get out of bed, we enjoyed a walk in the fresh air and had a huge breakfast. It wasn't long before we realized that we should get going and start our trip back for the 3:30 ferry. We knew we were really pushing it by catching the 3:30 ferry, instead of the 1:30, so we (leisurely) walked down from Caitlyn's to catch the bus downtown to Horseshoe Bay. Once at the bus stop, under cover from the light rain, we realized that traffic was at a standstill. The bus to get us to the ferry had already rushed past, full. After about 15 minutes of waiting, we found out that there had been an accident on the bridge, which explained why the traffic was not moving. We knew our husbands would kill us if we didn't make the ferry. What were two girls to do? So in true Booty Camp Girl style, we ran across the Lions Gate Bridge to Park Royal. Thats right. In lasts nights jeans, my Converse high-tops, and our loaded backpacks, we set out to run to the mall, then catch a cab to the ferry, all in hopes that we make the 3:30 ferry. I am pretty sure that it was about five minutes into it, that it started to pour down rain. It was raining so hard that water was sloshing in my shoes. My mascara made lines down my face, and my shirt was soaked through within the first fifteen minutes. It was awesome! I had always wanted to run across the bridge. We made it to Park Royal within 40 minutes, hopped into a cab and made it to the ferry in record time! We hit the washroom to change into some of our dry clothes, where Eli was able to look put together and fabulous in about three minutes, while I had a love affair with the hot air dryer. I tried to brush out my Diana Ross inspired rats nest, but upon hearing Eli yell "Put it back!" I threw it back up in a messy bun. The ferry ride home was long and cold.
I wanted this birthday to be an amazing and epic adventure and it was more than I could have ever hoped for. Thank you Eli for being my partner in crime, Caitlyn for letting us crash your place and taking us to the best restaurants, and Carleen for finding the perfect place to dance like I was 19 again. I truly have the best friends a girl could ever ask for. Thank you!
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